Things That Are No Longer Fun After Age 25!

1. Shots. What’s that thing where you make the poor decision to do something that you used to be able to handle fine just to prove you can still handle it, and then next thing you know you’re puking in a cab? Oh right, shots. 

2. Talking on the phone. When you and your high school best friend went to college, it was fun having the weekly two-hour phone call to share each other’s #NewExperiences. Now it’s just like, fuck you, text me, why must I use my voice. 

3. Going out both Friday & Saturday night. You used to thrive on the ability to go out all the nights of the week. Now you have to mentally pump yourself up (and take a nap Saturday afternoon) to be able to go out Saturday night. Friday night is out of the question, you worked all day. 

4. Eating junk food. Because pizza every day is and a greasy diet did not feel like death. But now you have an old(er) person’s digestive system and metabolism. Some late-twentysomethings still have iron stomachs, and power to them, Mac and cheese boxed dinners and Gatorade dinners don’t feel like they used to.

5. Complaining about your parents. Your parents, or at least one of your parents, is awesome. You did not know this until you realized recently that you are turning into your mom or dad,  and it’s actually kind of great.

6. Camping out in one of those nerdy overnight lines for a concert or a show. Waiting all night for that I phone or those Aldean tickets sounded like a good idea, until you froze and your back was killing you, so  “time to sleep on the pavement like a bag lady”  is just not that fun anymore.

7. Living in a house or apartment with roommates. It was fun once upon a time to be around your friends all the time. But now you just want to walk around in your underwear and be alone. 

8. Clubbing. You learn that you can listen to the country-hip hop mix of FGL/Nelly and hate the world in your own house, for free, in your sweats, without heels.

9. Pulling All Nighters. Gone are the nights where pulling all nighters were fun. Whether you were up finishing some assignment, out partying or on a movie watching binge, it can wait until tomorrow. I’ve got to sleep. 

10. Drama. Okay drama was never fun, but it’s even less fun when you’re 25 and you actually have real problems and real relationships that are on the line.